6 January 2009

Emotional Well-Being: How to Take Charge of Your Emotional Well-being

I want to wish you a happy, healthy and prosperous New Year.  May all your hopes and dreams come true.  What better time then now to take stock and make changes that will enhance your life.  One change that will benefit everyone is taking full responsibility for your emotional well-being.

Emotional Categories

Our emotions roughly fall into two categories: Weak Mode (remnants of childhood) and Power Modes.  Weak Modes of self are where we sense we are: helpless, dependent, depressive, or destructive.  Power Modes of self are where we sense we are: competent, growing and creative, healing and nurturing, and compassionate.

How Emotional States Generate Thoughts and Feelings

Each Mode of self has particular thoughts attached to them which generate certain feelings, and motivate certain types of behaviour.  Weak Modes generate negative thoughts and emotions which motivate negative, destructive behaviours.  Power Modes generate positive thoughts and emotions which motivate life enhancing behaviours.

We all experience both Modes of self from time to time.  We are prone to slipping into Weak Modes when we allow ourselves to get too tired, stressed or over worked.  When we are in Weak Modes our lives don't function well, we are operating well below our best, so it's in our best interest to choose to mentally shift ourselves into Power Modes as quickly as possible.

The Laws of Power

The First Law of Power: Ownership 

We don't have power over what we don't own.  Where are your emotions, in you or in the environment?  Powerlessness is when other people or situations own your emotions.  Power is when you own them.

The Second Law of Power: Focus

You are powerless when you focus on what you cannot do.  Focusing on what you can do makes your experience better.

The Third Law of Power: Acting in your long-term best interest 

Power is an internal state that allows you to act in your long-term best interest, regardless of external conditions.  Powerlessness is when your reactions to other people's emotions control you.  Power is doing what will correct, improve, heal, and make your experience better.

The Forth Law of Power: Self-knowledge

Powerlessness is self-ignorance, reacting on blind emotion and impulse.  Power is knowing your emotional and intellectual strengths at any given time.

The Fifth Law of Power: Switching from Weak Mode to Power Mode.

 

Weak Modes of Self

Are the origins of bad decisions, addictions, compulsions, abuse (of self and others), and FAILURE.

Power Modes of Self

Are when you are focused on your competence, growth, creativity, healing, caring, and being compassionate to yourself and others.

Negative Emotions

Negative emotions are not punishment, they are a signal that something might be wrong or what you are doing in your life is not working and to do something different.  Do you know what the definition of insanity is?  It's doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.

Choices

Life is full of choices.  You cannot not make a choice.  We are making them moment to moment.  Which mode of self would you rather be in, Weak Mode or Power Mode?  Do yourself a favour and choose to be in Power Mode as much as possible.  If you make this a choice that you focus on in 2009 you will find that your life will be on track more of the time.

The Compassion Anger Management Program

There is a possibility that I could be conducting a 3-day intensive program soon in the Logan area South of Brisbane.  I will keep you informed if there is any progress with this.  If you would like to express an interest in attending if it goes ahead, please let me know and I will email you if to let you know the details.

As always I have a 12-week online anger management program that is particularly suited to people who live in areas where they do not have access to such programs.  Their work commitments make it difficult to attend regular anger management programs, if they can find one at all, or if you don't feel comfortable in groups.

Other Services

I offer a number of other services that will assist your organisation and your workforce.  Please click on the links below to find out more or feel free to contact me for more details on any of these services.  I am happy to conduct any of these programs anywhere in Australia.

Employee Assistance Program

Empowered Workplace

Resentment: The Hidden Killer

The Compassion Program Training

Please pass this Newsletter along to a friend or colleague.  It would be much appreciated.

Once again I wish you and your loved ones all the best for the New Year.